Home and Heart

I spent this morning at Welcome Place, listening to the stories of three men from Somalia and Ghana.

They are now living in Winnipeg, having come across the US border as refugees. One of them has been here for a couple of years: He arrived mid-August 2015 by swimming across the Red River. The other two arrived in the dead cold of last December and have paid the price for their freedom - quite literally - with their digits, which were frozen so severely they have been surgically removed.

I then was given a tour through Welcome Place, and I saw the desks at which employees and volunteers sit to help refugees navigate their way through the many forms needed to file their case. They have just 72 hours from arrival on Canadian soil in which to file the first forms to make their claim; thereafter, they have just 15 days in which to expand on, and submit, their claim.

And I saw the bare-bones apartment that Welcome Place offers refugees as their first home in Winnipeg. It was compact and clean, but spare. Very spare. I tried to see it through the eyes of a mother who might arrive with her children having left everything behind in, let's say, Syria. And I tried to imagine what it must feel like to bear the burden of all that loss for the sake of all that might be gained in the future -- if only one can make it into that future with head and heart intact. And I wondered if I would have the courage and the fortitude, the daily confidence, to wake up and do all the very hard work of learning the language, navigating the city, meeting strangers, figuring out how to take the bus, how to find food my kids will eat, how to make friends...

And, truly, it's near impossible for me to imagine what it must feel like. Can you?

Whether or not you can, I am asking you to #openyourhearts and support the important work that happens 24/7 at Welcome Place. Big or small, every donation will help men and women and children who found the courage to leave their lives behind and to find their way into Canada and, they hope, a new and better future for themselves.

This is our time to make a difference. With Donald Trump rampaging across democracy in the US, and with Kevin O'Leary set to emulate the carnage in Canada (at least, that's what I believe he will do if he wins the Conservative leadership), I am committed to standing up for the core values that guide the work of the Manitoba Interfaith Immigration Council:

• Compassion
• Caring
• Understanding
• Acceptance
• Love

I stand #WithRefugees. Will you?

No more fraudulent thoughts

It's the day after America elected Donald Trump, quite possibly the most spectacularly unqualified candidate ever to run for President of the United States. It's not how I would have voted, but that is not what this post is about.

This post is about me suddenly realizing that it's totally and absolutely time that I stopped wasting even one more nano second thinking that I might not be qualified to teach a classroom of college students, offer an opinion in a meeting, lead a group on a project, suggest to a decision-maker up the hierarchy from me that their perspective could do with shifting...In other words, today is the day I own my own potential and take up the space in the world that my knowledge, skills and experience give me the right to do.

I'm fed up with others around me - often men - taking up air space with opinions and ideas not supported by facts, research or experience. And I'm really getting fed up with men being given the chance to lead when they have less experience than I have. Effective immediately, I know I can be - and should be - the acting chair in my department when the boss is away...and I'm going to let the boss know that I want that responsibility.

This sudden realization might be the only good thing that's come out of the 2016 US election for me. And I'm going to take it, and I'm going to run with it.

Look out world. Here I come.

A new MP for Winnipeg Centre?

Are you a Winnipeg Centre voter who wants to see an MP represent us in Ottawa 

who will be accountable to his constituents and visible on the ground in the riding 

doing work that furthers social justice for the people who live in this riding? 

I have voted in every election I was eligible for since I turned 18. Over the years, I have supported representatives from parties across the political spectrum and I have held memberships in some of those parties, too. Sometimes I wanted to support the national leader, sometimes the local candidate. But always, I wanted my vote to help fill the House of Commons with people whom I trusted to represent my values and my commitment to social justice.

A party's policies may come and go. They may not always hit the mark from my perspective, so I want my elected representative to be an effective and frequent communicator with me. I want them to knock on my door to ask me what my current issues are and to get feedback on their performance. I want to know that person and feel a connection with them as they work on my behalf at the municipal, provincial or federal level.

For these reasons, I am supporting the nomination of Allan Wise in the upcoming Liberal Party nomination meeting for the 2015 federal election. I gave him my vote last time round and wrote about my reasons here.

I will be giving him my vote this time round again, and I am asking you to consider doing the same. But before we can vote for Allan as our representative in Ottawa, we need to help him win the nomination in Winnipeg Centre.

Please email me at alerougete at gmail dot com if you are a Winnipeg Centre voter who wants to see an MP represent us in Ottawa who will be accountable to his constituents and visible on the ground in the riding doing work that furthers social justice for the people who live in this riding.

Gone fishing

I'm offline to renew and rejuvenate.

Laying fallow

More than six months without a post can mean only one thing: My focus has been elsewhere...

However, the new year and new beginnings are nurturing my creative juices - and my vision board for 2012 says WRITING EVERY WEEK, so stay tuned!

Who knows what will pop up here one day soon...

Lessons in the garden

Everything really important in life can be learned in the garden:

First the rain, then the sun, then things grow.

Ten minutes here and there keeps it looking good. Much better than good intentions to spend half a day making it look gorgeous.

Earthworms can be startling creatures but their work deep down is vital to what shows above.

Cats love sitting in among the plants. Natural (and wise) decorations that move with the sun.

Build a retaining wall and little kids will play on it. Young spirits bring good energy.

A plan is essential.

Ripping out wild and unexpected growth is essential.

Letting unexpected things spurt up between the plan is essential.

What was dormant last year, may come back better next.

Getting your hands dirty early in the season gives you a jump on new growth.

Whether sites of activity or quiet contemplation, gardens ARE life.

Monday's election: Vote local

This election, I'm voting local - I mean really local, for Winnipeg Centre's Liberal candidate who has worked on social justice issues in this riding for 20 years. Allan Wise arrived in Canada as a refugee from Iran and has lived through poverty and struggle, and always given back. Now I'm giving him my vote on Monday.

Allan is the executive director of the Central Neighbourhoods Development Corporation (CNDC), and teaches politics as a sessional lecturer at the University of Winnipeg.

Unlike Winnipeg Centre’s Conservative and NDP candidates, I have attended the last two all-candidates forums: one at Gordon Bell, the second at Magnus Eliason Recreation Centre. Bev Pitura attended neither, while Pat Martin was absent at Gordon Bell (he attended a fundraiser instead).

I first met Allan on my doorstep where, eloquently and passionately, he explained that he wants to be the voice for the people of this riding in Ottawa. He wants to take his experience with social justice issues and translate them into policies on housing, jobs and youth programs that make a difference on the ground, here at home. He has pledged to hold town hall meetings throughout the year and to listen to us more than he talks at us: “I have two ears and one mouth; this means I should listen more and speak less,” he says.

In my neighbourhood of Wolseley, we represent only 20% of the Winnipeg Centre riding, yet hold the voting power. We show up at the polls, while many, many residents north of Portage and west of Main Street do not.

Before you vote, please consider the record of our incumbent MP and think about everyone in our riding who needs – desperately needs – a strong, locally rooted voice in Ottawa. If this election is truly about change, that change begins with your decision about who to vote for on Monday. It matters to you and to me, and it likely matters even more to the kids who go hungry for lack of food in the fridge at home and who think a short stint in jail is the best way to find a place to sleep. For the single mothers of every race who cannot afford a decent, safe place to live and raise their children. For the immigrants and refugees who are trying to find their way into a new life of meaning and dignity in Winnipeg. The list goes on...

Think before you vote on Monday. Same old, same old is not the best choice this time round.

For more info about Allan Wise, visit him online at http://www.allanwise.ca/ .

The state's role in daily life

As we head into the final stretch of the current federal election, I am horrified by people's apathy. How can you not be interested in participating in the democratic process that brings clean water to your kitchen tap, content into your classrooms, snowplows onto your winter streets, clean camping sites into your provincial and federal parks, qualified doctors into your hospitals, skilled bureaucrats into innumerable positions of power, influence and service within systems that manage everything in Canada from housing to infrastructure to culture to immigration programs.

I feel strongly about voting, feel everyone should live up to their responsibilities as a citizen by voting, and wish that every eligible voter would ask themselves these two questions:

1. "What role do you want the state (government) to play in your life - when you're healthy? when you're sick? when your loved one is in trouble on the other side of the globe?" Do you want the state to have put in place systems that help you, support you, encourage you, rescue you? Or do you want to go it alone, always, because everyone should always be self-sufficient?

2. "Would you feel comfortable if all services in our society were privatized and run for a profit? And I mean everything from schooling to healthcare to utilitities to...the list goes on." Of course, when something is run for a profit the people involved often play third or fourth (never mind just second) fiddle to the bottom line.

I believe that government (the state) has a strong role to play in Canadian society, and MUST play a strong role to keep our country one in which every person has opportunity not only the person who is privileged with brains and money; to keep our country one that is open to immigrants and refugees who not only need our freedoms, but whose skills and contributions WE need; to keep our country one in which we can expect - every day - to have access to clean water, qualified healthcare professionals and educators....the list goes on.

Vote. Vote with your brain and your heart engaged. Do not succumb to voting for the incumbent merely because you recognize their name. Take the time to become educated and informed on the issues.

Even if you don't care about the outcome, I sure do.

Publishing - new frontiers

Everyone has a story to tell. Many of us write. Some of us want our work edited and published. Fortunately, more and more innovative options are being developed for writers to share their work.

The latest example I've seen is Unlimited Editions (http://unlimitededitions.ca/) - a truly innovative idea by Dropped Threads co-editor Marjorie Anderson, and published fiction and poetry author Deoborah Schnitzer. These creative women are using technology to reach out internationally to pull writers into a collaborative publishing venture that already has Jack Hodgins and Gail Anderson-Dargatz involved.

Check it out. If you're writing today, you need to stay on top of the latest innovations in your craft.

Life path

Our first challenge in life is to find our path. The second challenge is to continue pursuing that path, despite what others say, think or feel about our chosen direction. Satisfaction comes from understanding that we have, indeed, found the right path for ourselves. Suffering exists only when we cling to what is not or cannot be. If some in our life don’t approve of or appreciate our choices or perspective, that is their prerogative; it has precious little to do with us. Validation comes from within – not outside of – ourselves.

Of rights and risks

Elections, elections everywhere. But nary a leader in sight.

Well, that's not actually true, but it sure seems to be the mood of the people these days. Look anywhere - in your own city or across the border in the US - and the horizon is clogged with people complaining about politicians and the gravy train. Well, anger is a righteous emotion, but I'm not convinced it's prudent to make decisions while in the throes of it.

With our democratic right to cast a ballot comes the responsibility to BE responsible about that right. This means taking the time to listen beyond the 30-second sound bite and actually invest our energy in learning what the candidates are truly saying and - maybe most importantly - what the facts of the moment are.

There is so much nattering going on about "the fat" at City Hall (or in Ottawa or at the Leg or down in Washington - pick your political location)...and it's just that, nattering. How about someone in the media does some real investigating to unearth the FACTS about the fat: Is it really there? What would we be cutting in order to trim the fat? How much fat should we have in order for our lives to have some flavour, some meaning?

I'm getting mighty tired of the armchair politicos raising their voice in anger, while remaining firmly seated on the couch. Get out there and make a difference. Stop whining from the comfort of your blinkered perspective. Want to retain the right to vote? Then exercise your responsibility to be engaged in the process. With every right comes a risk. And we're on the verge of risking our collective democracy for the privilege of rule by anger.

When the pipes burst

Nothing in life is guaranteed. Not love, security, happiness or health. The only thing I know for sure is that I am in charge of choosing how to respond to the good and the bad that comes my way.

Yesterday, I learned the city water line that comes into my house has sprung a leak -- and it's my responsibility to have it replaced. Yikes - that will be messy and expensive. I'd love there to be someone to blame, someone to take responsibility. But there is no one and nothing to blame. The pipes are old and I happen to own the property they service. Damn and blast, but there you have it. Life. When you least expect it. Smacks you in the eye.

I am overwhelmed and exhausted even before I begin to sort this out. But focusing on those emotions will get me precisely nowhere.

Pick myself up. Dust myself off. And start calling those contractors. That'll get the ball rolling and repairs happening. Even though each step brings me one closer to my lovingly tended front yard being dug up, it's the only way through this mess. And it's going to get messier.

Oh well. At least the basement hasn't flooded...yet.

Volunteer with your eyes open

I've joined oodles of organizations in my life, most of them because I have believed in the issue or cause. Never did I engage in the kind of pre-joining scrutiny, however, that Doreen Pendgracs outlines in her new book: Before You Say Yes...A guide to the pleasures and pitfalls of volunteer boards. I've recently reconnected with Doreen (we worked together in the early 90s) and am happy to offer this review of her book:

Before you say yes....A Guide to the Pleasures and Pitfalls of Volunteer Boards
By Doreen Pendgracs
Published by Dundurn Press 2010

This 145-page guide to membership on volunteer boards is a gem. Open it to any page and you’ll find something of value: a quick & simple guide to Roberts Rules of Order; a checklist of what makes for an effective board meeting; tips on how to best embrace virtual meeting technology; suggestions for how to be an effective board member; a chart of motivators that can drive people’s actions; how to consider – and manage – the risk & liability you have as a director of an organization...and more.

Doreen Pendgracs’ central message is important: If you’re serious about contributing to an organization (for free!), then take the process of committing to that organization as a board member as seriously as you would consider taking on a job. It’s about matching your skills and objectives with the organization’s needs and it’s about making sure that you mesh with the organization’s culture. Too often, we join a board because our skills match their needs, but we forget to consider whether (or not) we’ll “fit” with the culture and the obligations inherent in board membership.

The structure of the book is reader friendly: Each chapter opens with a brief recap of the previous chapter and a short overview of the current chapter. This keeps the content clear in the reader’s mind and makes it really easy to dip into the book here and there yet sill know exactly how the current chapter is framed. That’s intelligent planning on the author’s part.

The text is broken up with numerous useful graphic elements – checklists, tables, charts, etc., which make the layout very inviting. Pendgracs has included lots of references and resources for further reading and research – very helpful for those of us who can get lost on today’s overloaded information highway! And she explains many terms that are often tossed around the boardroom table without explanation – fiduciary responsibility, for example.

Written in a friendly, engaging style, the book is a compilation of the author’s own experience on boards and the experience of people she has met over her 25 years of volunteering. Pendgracs doesn’t have all the answers – how could any one person or book claim that? – but she certainly covers a lot of topics, including backroom politicking and dealing with difficult people. Anyone contemplating joining a board – or wondering why they are still contributing to a board but getting nothing from the experience – will benefit from reading this book.

Average is perfect

'Hey - it's ok to be average; being average is normal - that's why most of us are average - it's where the meaning of the word comes from - most of us are it and it's average!' So said a workshop leader the other day, and I thought: What a great paradigm shift.

Instead of spending time and energy being extraordinary, exceptional, superlative and unique, why not spend time and energy simply being authentically who we are?

Of course, we're driven these days to perfection and exception, to individualism and uniqueness. But it's hard work and it doesn't seem to make us any happier.

How about we all resolve to chill in 2010. Forget perfection and exception. Aim for happy medium. Choose contentment. Settle for being authentic and kind and thoughtful.

Cop out or wisdom for the time? What do you think?

Value of relationship

I believe in the value of relationship. That's why I shop in independently owned stores and use the services of professionals. I know their name. They know mine. When push comes to shove, I want help from someone who actually knows me (the freshest brownie - Chris at Lilac Bakery; an emergency shoe repair - Brian at The Shoe Doctor; the most sensible investment advice - Darryl at National Bank).

Today's case in point: My travel agent, Linda Burndorfer of Out 'n About Travel.

Yesterday (Friday), I was headed to Edmonton for a 50th birthday party this evening (Saturday), but when the Air Canada desk agent suggested the weather was wicked and the plane had only a "fair" chance of landing, I rebooked for an early morning flight instead. However, when I checked on its status well before dawn today, it said DELAYED and then delayed again. What to do? Head to the airport only to wait around and be sent back home? Or call in the professional?

I picked option #2 and called Linda's office telephone number.

Within 15 minutes she called me back (and it wasn't yet 8:30am on a SATURDAY! Thank you iPhone that keeps her fully connected) and within 30 minutes of that she had worked some kind of travel agent magic and rebooked me onto an already-full flight this afternoon.

I don't know how she did it. And I don't need to. I only need to know that she can. That I can call her before it's really reasonable to do so on a Saturday morning. And that she'll know my name and do her magic, adding value like the professional she is.

Moral of this tale? Personal connections make life better - and easier. And, next time you need to book a trip, contact Linda at Out 'n About Travel: outnabouttravel.com

Beginner mind

At a local business meeting, I won a short consultation with a speech coach. The timing was good, as I will soon be giving a short speech at a friend's significant birthday celebration.

I was a bit nervous about testing out my speech with the coach as I teach speech writing and oral presentations at the college level. What would the coach say about my skills? Do I really know what I'm talking about in the classroom or am I just a fraud?

I forged ahead, not wanting to mess up - at any level. I wrote a draft of the speech, I practised it a few times. I went to the appointment. And I experienced a huge rush of satisfaction from being in the student seat instead of the teacher seat with this topic.

What a relief and a joy to simply give myself over to an expert and receive her comments on my content and performance. The coach gave me her undivided attention and honoured me with a critique of my content and performance.

The result? I am more confident as I approach the giving of this particular speech. And, maybe more importantly, I have been reminded of the value of approaching an expert with 'beginner mind': go as a prepared and willing student, open yourself to critique, be vulnerable, sit tall in that student seat and receive the teaching of an other.

Don't ditch that propane lantern!

We moved into our new cottage on a gorgeous weekend in mid-September and were already looking forward to having Thanksgiving there – more food, less work! Or so we thought.

We arrived late afternoon on the Friday. Slushy snow was on the deck and the weather was getting worse – like winter was arriving in October.

Although it wasn’t yet dark outside, it was dim inside the cottage, so I switched on the light to my left. Nothing happened. Oh, I thought. Maybe that switch doesn’t operate that light...And I tried another switch. Nothing. And nothing again in the living room. Every electrical item was off.

Finally, it dawned on me. There’s no power!

No power, for us, meant no heat as we were relying solely on baseboards because we hadn’t yet been cleared by our insurance agency to use the fireplace. No power also meant no teakettle, no coffee maker, no stove or oven – and no phone, as ours is a cordless jobbie that needs plugging in.

Ah, this would be interesting.

It was too late to head back to the city, so we unpacked the car and, as we were going back and forth, a phone started ringing. Can’t be ours, I thought, as we have no power; must be the neighbour’s who didn’t appear to be up yet. But the noise persisted and Val, being the natural-born explorer she is, followed it into the old shed where the noise got louder.

Yup, you guessed it. There’s an old (and I mean old) phone in there, hardwired in and, despite its grimy state, as welcome a sight as any you can imagine. We weren’t entirely cut off! We phoned Hydro and learned a line was down and power would likely be out for a while.

Ah, this would be interesting.

We hauled out our trusty old 3-ring propane-powered cooktop from the back room and cooked up a proper dinner, which we ate by candle- and camping-lantern-light...in our jackets, toques and gloves. We left the dishes for morning in hopeful anticipation of power (and, thus, running water) and went to bed. Man, those sheets were cold!

The power flickered on briefly at around midnight, but did not stay on, so the cottage was just as cold in the morning, although it was bright...from all the snow outside! In fact, it looked like a winter wonderland: Inches of snow had fallen, but at least it wasn’t really cold.

I explored outside to discover trees laden with heavy snow arching over our driveway; getting out would be a challenge. Then I looked down the road and it was worse: trees were so weighed down that the road was impassable. For better or worse, we were here to stay – at least for a while.

Neighbours were out and we exchanged info about the state of things and who had what kind of supplies. We were in this together! Then, from up the road, a convoy of about four vehicles approached: They were, literally, cutting and running: Cutting their way out with a chain saw and heading back to the city. Not a bad idea, I thought.

But Val would have none of it. The sun was beginning to come out, it was truly gorgeous outside, we could continue to cook with propane and, if we were desperate to get warm, we could make our way on foot to Blacks Point (it’s quite a hike from Islandview) where the power was back on and friends invited us to share their woodstove warmth.

In the end, we got warm enough puttering around figuring out just how many trees were down, so, when the power came back on at noon, we were happy to make coffee, wash the dishes and settle in for a snowy Thanksgiving stay.

Our friend Yvonne came up on Sunday, we roasted a delicious chicken and reveled in tales of fortitude.

The moral of this tale? No matter what the season, be prepared. Know where the matches and candles are. Never leave your propane tank empty. Don’t ditch the Coleman stove or lantern. And, always, keep an old fashioned phone in the shed.

Slow Mind

You've heard of the Slow Food movement? Well, I'm instituting a Slow Mind movement in my life.

Instead of trying to do as much as possible in any given day, hour, moment, I'm consciously NOT doing as much as possible. I'm doing everything that needs to be done and nothing that doesn't need to be done. It's remarkable to realize, consciously, just how different those two states are.

I'm taking the time to think rather than simply doing everything in the time I have: Why not amble down the sidewalk and scuff through the leaves? Why not do one errand at a time, instead of all the errands in one go? Why not take the time to read the entire Saturday newspaper instead of just skimming the headlines of the main section?

It means making room in my mind to enjoy the moment, rather than always looking ahead to prepare for what is coming next. It's more than just being mindful. It's being deliberate about slowing down my moment-to-moment living. It goes against the 21st century grain of constant connectedness, and it's liberating.

Go on. Unplug yourself. Slow down. Embrace a slower pace.

Working system

System not working: One minute Val is standing upright getting ready to go out, the next she's on the floor because her prosthetic hip slipped out of joint.

System working: For the first time ever, I dialed 911. The paramedics came. They were kind, capable and effective. Took Val by ambulance (no sirens) to hospital.

System working: The clever emerg doc assessed, advised and performed effectively. The joint was popped back into place (thank goodness for drugs).

We spend a lot of time complaining about our healthcare system, but at times like yesterday I bless Tommy Douglas for universal coverage: At no time did anyone ask us if we could pay, if we had coverage. Everyone simply did their job the best they could. Nothing happened quickly, but it happened effectively.

Let's remember that.

Editing the fridge

A tidy fridge is like a well-written text: elements carefully placed, correctly sorted, well structured. Open it up and you know what you're looking at, what you're getting into: post-modern chaos or zen-like haiku.

Like any text, the content of a fridge can benefit from a good edit, a ruthless sorting, a thorough proofing. Dig behind the mayo jar for the carton of cream, bring it forward, on the right - where the dairy goes. Move the cat food down below, where it belongs - beside the leftovers from (human) dinner. Keep the veggies in the bottom left drawer, the fruit in the bottom right.

Want the yogurt? Check up top on the right. Unless a post-modern user was there before you, in which case it's as likely mixed up in the cat food as it is on the dairy shelf. Makes me crazy!

I like my fridge in haiku form: tidy, clean, spare. My partner favours post-modern chaos: anything goes...anywhere. Sigh.

The solution? I edit the fridge.